11. You could be nice and simply say, "I don't have a strong view one way or the other." 41. The list below has a comeback for practically every situation you could possibly run into from the jerk boyfriend and the fake friend to the helicopter parent and the nosy neighbor. Just remember, with great power comes great responsibility. 8. Consider that the Vietnamese restaurant Pho 87 in Chinatown saw its gas bill jump from $800 in December to $8,000 in February. Or, you could be vaguer and just tell them that they seem different. like you've reached the pinnacle of comedy. Comebacks for When Your Depression Says 'You Suck,' a white woman with blonde hair drawn in pop art style. What do you think? If you're feeling extra ambitious and slightly willing to risk your job, there are even zingers for the notorious cranky customer. So for her sake and your ancestors' sake and for my sake don't ever fucking again sarcastically ask "who tf asked". 2. Read next: 27+ Savage Comebacks when Someone Insults You. I wont let some food snob penguins shame me into not eating saba, one of my favorite sushi orders. in Century City from the 1990s. something witty please :) Answer Save. Well, the jerk store called and theyre running out of you. George Constanza of Seinfeld dropped this epic line. One day in middle school my friends and I were all coincidentally wearing either pink or yellow shirts. Can you repeat that because I want to remember the dumbest thing Ive ever heard? Find out more about how we use your personal data in our privacy policy and cookie policy. Youre like the first slice of bread in the packet, everyone touches you but no one wants you. Julie analyzed each cookie and broke down what made each good. My friend is up and Im the insultee and, without hesitation, she says, Your teeth arent as white as they could be! I was flabbergasted. At the page end, you can vote for your favorite comeback. 199. Theres nothing quite like the satisfaction of firing off a savage comeback, especially when it leaves your adversary reeling. I think I have Alzheimer's because I can't remember when I asked for your opinion. Ouch. Two couples give their order to a convict waiter at the Jail Cafe, which opened in 1925 at Sunset Blvd. You bring everyone a lot of joywhen you leave the room. This one goes left then right then left again, salting the wound. Anyway, the guy finally interrupts her to say I AM NOT A PEDOPHILE, SO STOP ACTING LIKE A GODDAMN CHILD!, 10. If you want to keep the giggles going, check out these hilarious photos that will make you laugh out loud. Does this new robot-staffed chocolate emporium signal a themed restaurant comeback? This is another witty comeback that works great because it is attacking the size of the d you were just offered to suck. I'll keep trying though. I heard a kid tell one of his classmates that they smell like hot dog water,' shares one Buzzfeed contributor. 32. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? I had a wet dream about you. Oops, my bad. Theyd like We've all been there: knowing the best comebacks to say after the argument is over. Tell me, how did this comment effect you? 43. The comebacks will stop the behavior immediately, and could even influence that person in the future. January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. You're fucking dead, kiddo.. Shut the fuck up and go back to the storm drain where your mother abandoned you. RELATED:27 Passive-Aggressive Quotes That Are Actually Pretty Inspiring. We've received your submission. If you need to go full stealth-mode, here are 16 compliments you dont realize are actually pretty insulting. Do you ever wonder what to say, or not to say, on a first date? Check our our top ten comeback lists. There is the attention you were looking for. This is the ultimate chocolate chip cookie, with everything readers asked for (crispy edges, yes! Watch popular content from the following creators: factz4youxx(@factz4youxx), I asked it and I stand by it. Back story: My mother is unkind. She spent so much time trying to make me feel worthless, she might as well have bee If you would like to customise your choices, click 'Manage privacy settings'. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, Press J to jump to the feed. Dont worry about me. Please consult your doctor before taking any action. If the topic is relevant to something that they are interested in, or if it's important enough that they should care about it, tell them how. Thats an interesting point of view. Unfortunately, thinking of the perfect comeback in the moment can be tough. 84. comeback: Ok, dont want my opinion bye (walks away) Your so fat you need cheat codes to play Wii fit. A lady points and laughs and says: Look! I often share my opinions, and people say, Did I ask?. So next time someone comes at you with an insult, you can hit them with one of these savage comebacks in an argument and watch them squirm. Founded in 2010, Thought Catalog is owned and operated by The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. For over a decade, we've been at the bleeding edge of media, pioneering an infrastructure for creatives to flourish both artistically and financially. "My favorite party trick is not going." 9. I see youre still stuck in middle school. Tread carefully with this one, friends! Before answering that question, he looks back at Southern Californias theme restaurant past, from the questionable Jail Cafe in which diners in the 1920s ate in a cell and ordered from waiters dressed as convicts to Steven Spielberg and Jeffrey Katzenbergs DIVE! Thanks for the compliment. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069. However, theres nothing wrong with spending a little time thinking of a savage comeback ahead of time. Which means you're just as hard to remove. Watch popular content from the following creators: factz4youxx(@factz4youxx), combacks405(@combacks405), (@minofishh), (@_x.random..things.x), (@g1rlxtipx), znhzzz(@znhzzz), [swag](@x.eunoia.gracexx), - val -(@glossiervals), Random things David Letterman: Im not as dumb as I look. Insults are never fun, but they can be especially hurtful when they come from someone we know and care about. If I wanted to hear from an asshole, all I had to do was to fart. I often eat lunch in my car, seated in the passenger seat. 47. Aug 7, 2013 - Here is a top ten list of snappy comebacks that you can use in most situations, from surviving a family dinner with your annoying relatives to pushing back on your obnoxious coworker. 12. Of course, its important to be strategic about when you use your comebacks. Laugh like a maniac and shut jerks up with these really funny comebacks and insults. "No, i'm not asking, i'm just telling". With any luck, theyll think twice before trying to mess with you again. Im very skinny and my arms are noodles so my friend told me, You look like Steve Rogers without the serum.. Its politically correct, its not angry, mean, condescending, confusing, long winded, weird, or ineffective. Here is my list of comebacks, just so youre always prepared. Remember, words are powerful weapons, so use them wisely! 15+ Flirty Responses to You look like trouble!. If you keep talking, Im going to assume youre in desperate need of a dictionary. They were refusing to eat saba mackerel after cost-cutting measures forced their minders to stop buying pricier horse mackerel. Still, it wasnt until a U.S. Youre so ugly, you couldnt even arouse suspicion. Inflate your ego to overcompensate for it being so fragile? I forgot the world revolves around you. Some babies were dropped on their heads, but you were clearly thrown against a wall. 42. Buzzfeed, 14 Hilarious Comebacks That Only Took People a Few Hours to Come Up With Youtube.com , Legally Blonde (4/11) Movie CLIP First Day of School (2001) HD Remember when Captain Jack Sparrow, under threat of capture and arrest, takes a moment to deliver a devastating zinger? Your support helps us deliver the news that matters most. 25. They are trying to deflect the question back into your court so they wont have to commit themselves one way or another or tip their hand. I had a 20 Something 20 Somethings 30 Somethings after dark best comebacks Burns Comebacks Comedy digs Funny genius responses Hilarious how to respond humiliate Humor Insults Jokes laugh on demand laugh out loud lol Love and Relationships Offensive One-Liners Relationships Relationships & Dating roast STFU what to say Zingers The point being of course that whatever they have asked is none of their business. 45. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. If a guy asks you where you've been all his life, simply say, "Living mine." Me neither. A gross guy at a bar blurted out What ARE you? referring to my ethnic ambiguity, shared one Buzzfeed contributor, I ignored him and walked away with my friends, but what I shouldve said was Out of your league. Sorry for the mean, accurate thing I said. Yes, I'm saying your date is a blow-up doll. >:), I can tell you these wouldnt work too well. One of New Zealands Prime ministers (I think it was in the 80s) once said that people who moved from New Zealand to Australia were raising the IQs in both countries. Mine is unlisted. CAROLE R. IN ARIZONA, DEAR ABBY: As a child I heard and still remember my moms answer to that question. I often share my opinions, and people say, Did I ask?. Luckily, I have compiled a short list of all the things I could say, if he annoys me. With these 51 good comebacks, you have unprecedented opportunity to hit back to the right place at the opportune time and wipe those stupid smirks off the faces of your enemies. Here are some cool examples of the same that are bound to make you break into a smile. WebSavage Comebacks You should come with a warning label. Whether youre responding to a bully, an idiot, or just someone who needs to be put in their place, a snappy retort can be the perfect way to put them in their place. Oh, you dont like being treated the way you treat me? I never claimed to be answering a question. I dont know what your problem is, but Ill bet its hard to pronounce. I thought I heard someone who actually knows what theyre talking about. Our natural instinct is often to fight back with a response that only furthers the argument. Here are some mean comebacks to say to a guy: So there you have it, some mean comebacks to put that jerk in his place. 48. 6. Take a look at these awesome comebacks for bullies! Im surprised your teeth arent brown from all the shit talking you do. Here are some groan-worthy jokes you cant help but laugh at. Our website services, content and products are not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. WebIf somebody said I didnt ask you, in response to something Id said, Id respond one of the following ways (depends on mood and moment): Prompt: I didnt ask you.. save. I think if you memorize anything here, stick with this one, it will get you out of even the toughest corners. I may not be perfect, but at least Im not you. How To Take Care Of Your Digestive System, Everything you need to know about Super Bowls and the Super Bowl LVII. Recommended Reviews. Your legs are like McDonalds, open 24/7. The 100 best comebacks ever include witty, snarky and great insult responses. 20. WPC Overview; About Secretary; Working Council 196.Life is full of disappointments, just ask your parents. And if this one doesnt do it for you, weve got plenty of pirate jokes on deck. Julie Giuffrida, who is the queen of recipe archives at L.A. Times Food, has been on a months-long quest to come up with the ultimate chocolate chip cookie recipe. Some day youll go farand I really hope you stay there. I love this, I get bullied A lot and now this made me feel stronger thanks so much. We got into a fight with a random girl at the park, and when we were walking away she screamed after us, What are you gonna do, strawberry lemonade?. Hi! 10. Its impossible to underestimate you. 2023byTango Publishing Corporation All Rights Reserved. I guess thats why theyre so mad. Im sorry, I didnt hear you over the sound of how much I dont care. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. This squid is so raw I can still hear it telling SpongeBob to fuck off. (also from Reddit user). "Did you parents and friends love you, no". Too bad you cant Photoshop your ugly personality in real life. I hope your fingers change into fishing hooks, and you get an itch in your balls. I dont know what your problem is, but Ill bet its hard to pronounce. (from Reddit user), Bold of you to assume that I would need permission to answer the likes of you. Today. I took my wife for breakfast this morning to a restaurant close by. The waitress brought us to our booth. As I went to sit down, I looked at You realise I could just say didnt ask back to your comment and it would actually carry way more weight because your comment was directed towards me, while mine was not directed towards you? The Sovereign Lord is my strength! My phones battery lasts longer than your relationships. In this blog post, well be uncovering 55 of the most savage comebacks for any and all arguments that will help put an end to any debate faster than you can say goodbye. If you were any more wrong, youd be right! That guy couldnt score in a brothel. It took me a bit to realize the realness of that burn calling him talentless is clearly emotional and untrue, but calling him mediocre/flash in a panfuck, wish I was so composed while angry. Search for: Menu Close. By Jill Zwarensteyn Written on Mar 22, 2022.